Kintsukuroi // beautiful ending {the final chapter of 2015}

"Oh, why do I let myself let go

of Hands that painted the stars

and hold tears that fall?

And the pride of my heart makes me forget

It's not me but You, that makes the heart beat

I'm lost without You, Your dying for me

So tell me, what is our ending?

Will it be beautiful, so beautiful?"

-Beautiful Ending by BarlowGirl

// 2015 was a whirlwind. 

It was a tsunami that has left me stunned, numbed and speechless. I still can't believe it's nearly gone, and I still can't believe all that happened within these 365 days. 

Not gonna lie, I've had pleasanter years. 2015 was exhilarating and bombastic. It was full of beautiful moments and wonderful memories. 

But I also made mistakes, had my heart broken a few times and cried myself to sleep more times than I can count. Along with the good memories, there are plenty of times I wish I could forget. Things I wish I hadn't said, bad choices I made. I wandered away from God many times. 

I feel like I was a prodigal child this year in my relationship with the Lord. Still, as I draw back closer to Him, His grace and peace only becomes sweeter. 

Even amidst those painful experiences and messes I got myself into, there is still a silver lining. I learned valuable lessons which I will never forget, and you can mark my word, I won't be making the same mistakes again. I am a stronger person for having gone through 2015. Parts of me may have been broken, but I know these scars do not define me. When you look at me, don't think that I presume to know everything or imagine myself to be immaculate. Don't look surprised when you find out I've taken some hits and botched things up. 

I was just a shattered vessel that the Lord pieced back together with love and patience. I'm no longer broken because He has won the victory for me and He has pulled me out of the ashes. I'm not the same girl you knew last year. I'm a work in progress. God is writing my story, and I'm just trying to go where He leads. 

So, from this perspective, 2015 was like a piece of kintsukuroi - broken Japanese pottery that is pieced back together with gold. In the end, the pottery is even more beautiful for having been broken.

Some of the highlights from 2015 included but were not limited to -

♪ many amazing reenactments and improving my reenacting impressions vastly

♪ taking up snare drumming for reenacting, creating my female soldier impression

♪ my very first individual piano concert

♪ lots of piano teaching

♪ lots of instruction with my own piano teacher 

♪ lots of adventures traveling and exploring new places with people I care about

♪ lots of trips to get coffee with mom 

♪ starting a beautiful courtship with my best male friend

♪ revising The Rebels of Florida, to be completely historically accurate

♪ started brainstorming other new book ideas

♪ got to go to lots of dances

♪ started up my own local monthly contra dance group 

♪ got my first car

♪ went shooting, canoeing, camping, and hiked everywhere possible

♪ got paid to do my biggest art commission ever 

♪ got to meet two of my distance writing friends, Lauren and Carilyn in person

♪ our family had a cow for a little while

♪ got to hear/see the Piano Guys in person

from when our dear friends visited

reenacting memories

McIntosh contra

Gainesville contra, for the first time together

my ride!

before-Maygan's-wedding girls' day out

My best friend's wedding happened <3

With one of my piano students at the first recital I coordinated 

playing with the Morses at Ocali Country Days

possibly my favorite picture of the year

canoe trips with him are the best

My favorite commission yet 

 Southern Lights playing at the Micanopy festival 

Southern Lights playing at the McIntosh fall festival

from the visit with my dear friend Carilyn 

teaching my brothers their anatomy got kinda crazy

he's into daredevil, i'm into river tam and shiny 

korean writings - i think this will be my motto this year 

Anyways, there you go!

It was a memorable year. Here's to twenty-sixteen being remarkably better, and much more full of Christ. ♪ ♥

A Severe Case of Blog Neglect

 

Time stops for no one.

 

Like seriously, sometimes I wish it would. Dude, we're half-way through 2014 already. What. even. happened?! 

I guess I shouldn't be alarmed, because every single year this moment rolls around and....yeah. It's a continuous cycle. The equilibrium of life would be lost, without it.

Anyhoo, if you though this was the typical opening to an apologetic "sorry I've been so absent" post, I hate to break it to you but.......

 

.......um, yeah, that's what it is.

 

I hate writing apologetic posts explaining my absence from the bloggy hemisphere. On one hand, I feel guilty about being gone, but on the other hand....I have a life. I can't be on the computer all day and honestly doing so hurts my eyes. So yeah.  Plus I just haven't had /time/.

 

Valid excuses, people. Totally valid excuses. *cough*

 

 

Soooo much has happened this year and especially these last few months. My being overflows with exhilaration and near-terror because some stuff occurred that I just...wasn't....expecting. God totally has a sense of humor, and to say He works in mysterious ways is a major understatement.

The thing is, His plans always make sense - even if, in the heat of the moment, they seem so crazy and just..."excuse me, what?"

 

We humans have such a limited understand of the grand scheme of things. We only see a few inches in front of us at a time. I can't trust my own judgment and vision, because it's an incomplete work that must be constantly renewed and adjusted according to Scripture. I can't trust my emotions, because they lead me into the pits of depression, the mountains of narcissism and the whirlwinds of complete madness.

 

It truly is all about walking by faith, and not by sight.

 

Oh yeah and all these pictures are from last month's annual week-long beach vacay.

 

 

 

It was a lovely trip. Always is.  I love the beach, even though I may be a country girl through and through. I got to visit a lot with my cousins, grandparents and of course my own immediate family, which is always nice.

 

My cousin and I...quite a duo.

 

 

So besides the beach, what's been happening lately? Well, I.....

• Had a pretty major art commission - actually, a childrens' book cover.
• Started writing once a month for the Survival Mom  blog.
• Been working on promoting my piano lessons business.
• Tomorrow (erm...later today I guess it is? haha it's trippy sometimes being a night-owl) I have an audition at the Ocala Piano Conservatory concerning the furthering of my own musical education. This has been something I've been praying over for two years now. It's nothing short of incredibly daunting, and immensely tremendous.
• Graduated from high school!! (whooooo!)
• Been trying to finish my ICR creation science courses.
• Began the process of looking for an agent to represent my historical novel, TROF. Been working on the query letter and all that glamorous (not) fun.
• My band and I got to play at our first PAID gig! It was a living history event in Ocala. (below are some pictures from it)
• I decided I'm a hippie free-spirit of sorts, minus the irresponsibility, drugs and all that junk. 

 

If only I could make my entire income from music gigs...it couldn't get much better than that. Seriously. Being a musician is awesome.  And it's even more awesome when people are willing to pay you well for it...

 

 

So yeah, a lot has been going on and so much more is ahead. Life has been crazy and you know what? That's the best kind.

 

To end this not-so-apologetic post, here's a few random jams I found which you should check out because they're just so chiiiiillllllll. Not to mention, addictive.

 

| Changed (DJT Remix) - Mario & Vidis |

 

 

| Beautiful Life - Martin Roth |

 

 

| Foreign Language - Flight Facilities | (loooove <3 )

 

 

You're welcome.

 

So what's been new with you peeps? I have missed you guys. Catch me up on things?

 

Soli Deo Gloria,

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Oh, hiiiii.....wait, you're still here? You didn't go? Why are you still here? I just left my closing signature a mere inches above....um, this is the part where you go comment....

 

 

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You're still here. Why?

 

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Wellllllllll then.

 

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Okayyyy so you're probably curious now why I didn't end the post already.

If you actually took the time to read all this....props to you! You're smart. And probably a bit suspicious, by now. Good. *rubs hands together*

Well, your efforts shall not be unrewarded. You see, my dear reader, this is not the end of the tale.

Not everything has been laid on the table.

 

There is still news which I have yet to share.

 

News.

 

 

News.

 

 

News.

 

 

NEWS.

 

And with that, I leave you with a single hint.

 

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Bye, y'all. ;)