Self Destruct {a new story idea}

 

For centuries, it's been acknowledged that humanity is its own worst enemy.

Within each human mind is a constant struggle between voices of good and evil. Some people consider themselves to have split personalities. What if, in a certain dimension, this became more than just a mental battle? What if the voices had physical bodies just like us? What if your split personality had a body and its own free will?

In 17-year-old Lotus' world, not everyone has the ability to recognize that the greatest adversary lies within their own skins. Only a small remnant of the human race have obtained the power to see their alter-egos in action as they go about causing all sort of pandemonium. To those who haven't been burdened with this ability, this skill is seen as a curse, a mental disease. But to those who are able to see the Speculum Carnis (Latin for "mirror self"), or Specks, it's no joke. Specks are dark, dangerous creatures which possess no mercy or justice. As the complete opposite of good, they are responsible for everything evil in the world. Lotus is one of the few who can see the Specks, and it haunts her daily. According to the tradition of the Speck viewers, when she encounters her own mirror-self she must destroy it, or it will destroy her. The only problem is, Lotus kind of likes her Speck. Sometimes she hears her Speck's voice echoing in her mind. It's weird, but the two share a bond which Lotus can't figure out. It isn't normal to bond with one's hated mirror-image. But how can Lotus kill a part of herself?

 

***

 

This, my dears, is the beginnings of a fabulously random novel idea which came to me around 2AM (don't ask why 2AM) the other morning whilst I was listening to thissssss. *points below*

 

Chase The Light | Two Steps from Hell

 

I demand that you listen to it. You absolutely must. Seriously, just listen okay? And ideally, you listen while reading that synopsis up there, just so's you get a small picture of what my inspiration was while writing it.

 

This stuff is just freaking. uber. amazing.

 

Of course, whenever is TSFH not??!?!

 

Anywaysss yeah.

 

So my imagination was soaring, searching for a way to manifest something epic to correspond with this music. I don't know about y'all but when I listen to epic orchestral music it makes me want to go do big, epic things. Like, transport myself into one of my book worlds, fly one of my griffins, and overthrow all the other-dimension evil dictators. That, or run a marathon. Or save somebody's life. Or something.  

After listening to it on repeat several dozen times, Self Destruct popped into my head out of thin air. (The title itself actually came the next day.)  Like, literally, my mind was a messy soup of discombobulating thought processes one moment, and the next minute, voila, look what we have here....

 

Music is so powerful. Who needs drugs and junk like that when you have brilliant music to listen to?

"My death is inevitable. At the end of the day, there's just one thing I can count on.

I will die, sooner or later. In some way, part of me will be gone. The question is not if I survive - but which side of me will remain? What if that creature out there - my mirror self who I've shared so many memories with - overtakes me? What if she wins? What would the world be like without the good version of me?"

 

// random snippet I threw together for a GTW Facebook post //

 

"Dare I admit she's as evil as they say? Dare I admit that this horrific monster is actually a part of me?"

 

***

 

Like a lot of other poor writerly souls, I have a, shall we say, 'slight' Pinterest addiction and a thing for making boards for all my current books/story ideas.

 

Therefore, I instantly whipped up a nifty little board for Self Destruct. More pins to come. (That's a fact Jack!)

 

Follow Leah Kathryn's board Self Destruct on Pinterest.

 

What do you peeps think? Is this a weird idea or does it actually have potential to be something epic? I'm not sure myself at this time, but I must admit I'm pretty darn excited to see what happens with it. There are soooo many different Biblical analogies I'm eager to employ. Oh yes, and did I mention crazy plot twists and surprise endings? Hehe. Of course. I thrive on those.  

 

Before I depart, I wanted to share another song I found that is also super chill. It reminds me of the whole dreams-based premise of If Dante Had Wings. (another book-in-the-making of mine, in case you didn't know) Anything that reminds me of one of my novel projects instantly makes me happy. ^_^ So, give it a listen. You're welcome, in advance.

 

 

Days Turn Into Nights | Delerium (Seven Lions Remix)

 

***

 Hope y'all are having a very blessed week! Take time to enjoy the little things in every day, and always bloom where you're planted! ♪

 

To Keep You Off My Mind

 

 

// A Tribute to Nathan Laredo & Sophrona Nassau, the dearly-spellcheck-dubbed "Firestone Couple"  //

 

When it was just me, life was awful.

The moment you came along, life turned amazing.

Now that you're gone, there's no life at all.

 

***

 

I've been so conflicted about The Rebels of Florida lately. Actually. To be completely honest, it hasn't been on my mind very much at all, period. Which is really sad just in itself. *sniff*

But time has been lacking. What time I have has been put to use in finishing my studies for the ICR courses, when on the computer, anyhow. And then I have the Conservatory, and piano students. And I try to keep in shape. Then of course, you have chores and meal-prep, and calls with my 'foil'. *youknowwhoyouare/insertrandomnoncreepywink* So yeah. Doesn't leave much time for writing.

 

And then there's lack of motivation. See, I have a decent query letter written up, thank to the help of some brilliant writerly friends, but now I have the darn synopsis to contend with. 

 

 Just why on earth did I ever have to decide on writing a book that had five MCs in it?!

 

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

 

You know why?

 

Because I was twelv years old when this thing got started. That's why.

 

Twelve-year-olds do weird things. Eighteen-year-olds do weird things too, but I like to think I've gotten at least a little more logical since then. And if not more logical, at least....well, I like to think I have a decent head on my shoulders - when that head isn't controlled by a body full of raging hormones.

 

So now I'm stuck with a melodramatic child/book that's just about as dear to me as an appendage.

An appendage that's mine, anyways. Not just any random, disconnected appendage. That would be weird.

 

*cough*

 

So yeah. This melodramatic book I called my baby.

 

 TROF.

 

It kills me, but I love it to death. It's destroyed my already instable emotional wellbeing, and yet I've devoted so much of my life to its eventual success.

 

What would I do without it? Who knows. Maybe I'd have mastered the piano by now. Perhaps I'd have written a whole other series because I didn't have to focus on rewriting so much, and historical accuracy issues. 

But maybe a big piece of me would also be gone. Maybe my ability to express my feelings toward life would be hindered. Maybe a section of my heart would be missing.

 

I don't want to know. I love this thing too much to let it go.

 

Must. Write. Synopsis. Must. Write. Synopsis. And. It. Can't. Be. Lame.

 

A book six years in the making cannot have a lame synopsis, whatsoever. It just can't.

 

 

Oh yeah. And then when I was driving home today from Conservatory, I turned on the radio and heard one of the saddest, most tragic songs ever.

 

// Stay High (Habits) by Tove Lo //

 

"gotta stay high all the time to keep you off my mind."

 

It's like the epitome of human nature, conveyed in three minutes and twenty-nine seconds. Humanity is constantly searching for a healing balm for our souls. We all want someone to cherish and love us. We want to cherish and love back. And we will do whatever it takes to find some form of this. The thing is, we settle for cheap, plastic forms of 'love' which don't count. We settle for momentary pleasure over life-long commitment because we don't trust in God's planning, or we aren't interested to know what that planning even is. We settle for momentary pain-killers that don't really kill the pain. We're just so desperate for something.

 

This song conveys that well. Drown out everything, do whatever it takes to forget. Even if it means sleeping with a different guy every night, and drinking all your money away. Just do what it takes.

 

So yeah. From a spiritual aspect, this song stinks. And it might get you in a downer kind of mood.

 

 

At the same time, you know what ran across my head when I listened to the chorus a few times?

 

"Oh my stars. This is so Nathan."

 

And then I was reminded of those final chapters. Those chapters I wrote last year, right around this time, in fact. Funny how times passes and you forget things like that.

As I listened, I pictured the opening of Frayed Horizons. (TROF'S sequel) I look at Nathan's jaded brown eyes and see the wrinkles permanently etched in his forehead. His mouth is carved into a straight line, he stares straight ahead at nothing; his visage transparent to the deadness inside him. Nothing numbs the pain. Soon, there's no pain to numb. You can't numb something that has no feeling.

 

When seen in this light, suddenly this song became 10x sadder. Before I knew it, I had tears forming in my eyes. Amazing how quickly emotion can be evoked over one simple song and its potential connotations. Gahhhhhhhh. Haaaaalp meeeeeh. WID (writing induced depression) is on the verge of returning.

 

When it was just me, life was awful.

The moment you came along, life turned amazing.

Now that you're gone, there's no life at all.

 

Nathan, I'm truly sorry. I am. I promise. I'm not lying. It....may be hard to believe, but I hate what happened to you. I truly do. Okay, so you don't have to believe me. Whatever. But at least you heard it from my own lips.

 

Just trust me on this one. It will get better. I promise.

 

(Yeah, I think it's generally against wisdom to write random unsolicited blog posts at 2:00 in the morning.)

 

70 Followers Giveaway!! TWO WINNERS!

 

Soooo guess what we have starting today, folks?

 

A GIVEAWAY. Yesss, that's right, finally another giveaway! The occasion? This blog reached 70 followers about two weeks ago.

 

70 followers!

 

I can't believe how this blog has grown in the last year. You all have really blessed me with your encouraging comments and just the fact that you take the time to even read my crazy stuff. I know I'm a mess and hard to put up with a lot of the time. So, just so you peoples know, I love you guys. Thank you for being who you are!

 

Sooooo. I guess most of y'all probably didn't know that I am actually already a published author.

Self-published, I'll admit, but still published. So there.

 

Anyways. How that applies to today's big giveaway?

 

 

When I was 12 years old, my awesome writer/journalist dad helped me self-publish my first poetry book. How exciting that was for me way back when.

Now, it is pretty amusing getting to look back and read the work of a 12 year old version of me!

 

 

When I was 14, another volume came along, also once again self-published with the help of my dad's skill. I'm a lot more 'proud' of this one I'll admit, since my writing greatly improved in those two years.

 

So. Today, I'm giving away a copy of both books, plus a pack of organic eye shadows from Willow Tree Minerals, and a pair of homemade earrings from Wonder and Whimsy.

 

 

 

So, I think this time I'm gonna split this into two different winners. Two lucky peeps will get something here - a poetry book, and either some eye shadow or earrings! How fun is that? Now you have all the more chances to win. *wink*

 

(Note to any guys who might be reading this/might want to enter. I know there's girly stuff predominantly in this giveaway...the eye shadow, earrings...I wish I had something to include that was more masculine. :P So. If you want to enter just for one of the books, and say you do *win*, I can leave out the eye shadow/earrings or give them to another winner. :P)

 

Now get entering! And why not spread the word around about it, too? Pretty please?

 

Have fun and 'good luck!'

 

 

 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Smitten Fool

(A very random photo that has nothing to do with today's very random post)

-

I'd like to announce that I have now officially hit 70,000 words in my primary WIP, my favorite novel, and also the project I've been spending 4 years of my life on...The Rebels of Florida.

70,000 WORDS!!! *throws confetti* It's hard to believe, on one hand. On the other, it's rather rediculous to celebrate it, because...well, I've been working on this durned book since I was 12, and I would have liked to have finished it two years ago at 14. *Sigh* So if anything, I should be slapping myself for not having accomplished that goal. Oh well. The past is the past and what matters is now, right? I'm just happy to be making even the slightest bit of progress in this project.

To celebrate, I'll let you see a snippet of my most recent writings therein.

 ---

"That was when her heart stopped. She gasped, staring at the wagon sitting out in the front, parked alongside the road. It was a simple Conestoga frame, without the tarp roof attached. But the wagon itself was not what stopped Emma in her tracks.

In it, sat Mr. McIntosh…Silas’ father.

Great heavens, look at me. Agh, my hair, my dress…  Figures they would have to come on such a day…oh, drat!

Emma felt herself breaking into a nervous sweat, as she continued to stare involuntarily at the wagon like a smitten fool."

---

What did you think? I happen to particularly like the last sentence. It really fits Emma well.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful, blessed weekend!

Notice: All work, references and quotes from The Rebels of Florida are copyrighted by the author.